Fear Holds Me Back
by OrgyMemberXVII
Summary: There's a snowstorm going on outside. Alfred and Feliciano discuss their relationship as they are trapped inside. Human names used.


Alfred was standing in his kitchen sipping his coffee and staring outside the window. A snow storm was going on and it looked bad out there. The roads were covered in a snowy white blanket that was bad to drive on and if any tried, it could result in an accident. The sky was a medium gray and it was covered by equally gray clouds with the snow falling out. These days always excited him when he was a little nation but now that he was a grown nation these days still excited him, especially when he had a guest over. Speaking of the guest, Alfred could hear the footsteps coming. With an amused smile he turned to see Italy wearing one of his t-shirts.

Feliciano was staying over his house for a few days and was supposed to go back to his house today but since there was a snowstorm going on, he'd have to go back later. The blond walked over to him and kissed his lips. Feliciano was taken by surprise then quickly melted into the kiss. They had been dating for a while now and no one knew about the relationship they had and, frankly, they didn't want to tell any of the other nations about them just yet. When someone asked if they had a thing going on they'd say that they didn't have anything going on and that they were just great friends. It killed them to hide and yet they hid their relationship. They broke the kiss and were panting for air when Italy smiled.

"Good morning America!" The taller country laughed and wrapped his arms around Feliciano's waist.

"Good morning my little Italy. Looks like we got snowed in." Feliciano raised a brow in question prompting Alfred to move out of the way. Brown eyes widened as he stared out the window. There was so much snow everywhere, the plane to Italy must have been cancelled! Don't get him wrong, he loved spending time with his boyfriend but he wanted to go home so that Lovino wouldn't be suspicous and call him out on the relationship. He wasn't ready to tell his older brother yet because of how protective he'll get. His curl fell down to match his mood as he turned around and heavily sighed.

"You were hoping to get home?" Alfred spoke up.

"Si. You know how my brother gets and I don't want him to call me out on our relationship because then I'll talk and let everything out before I'm even ready to tell him."

"So what if you blab about us? It'll mean we won't have to keep the secret any longer than we have to." Alfred hated keeping secrets. It didn't feel right to him to lead people on and have something else going on that no one knows about. He was a pretty open guy so keeping is hard for him and its even harder now since Arthur is on to them. Alfred wanted to tell the man that felt like a father to him for most of his life but there was Feliciano who didn't want anyone to know. He wanted to respect his boyfriend's wishes to keep what they have a secret but as the days passed it became hard.

"Alfie please not today..."

"I just don't see why it would be a big deal if everyone found out! I love you and you love me, isn't that enough to go on if no one likes it?"

"I'm just not ready..."

"I'm ready! I've been fucking ready since the 50's! I hate hiding this because I love you so much and I want to let the world know and it kills me being not able to do that. Do you know how it feels to want to be able to want to tell a wonderful secret involving someone you love but you love that person you love them so much that you can't say anything? That's how I feel." Feliciano looked at the floor. He knew how Alfred felt but he didn't want anyone to know.

"Alfred... mio amroe... I know how you feel but we can't tell anyone yet."

"Why not? And tell me the truth, not the "I'm not ready yet" line." Feliciano stayed silent. He didn't want to tell Alfred the truth. While it was true that they'd been together since the 1950's, Feliciano didn't want Alfred to know his real reasons for not wanting to say anything but, if he didn't want Alfred to be mad at him, he had to tell the truth.

"I'm afraid."

"Afraid of what?"

"Afraid of what the other countries, including my brother, will say! When Germany and I were together for those brief years during the war everyone looked happy about it but then there were some nations who didn't think we'd be together and said that we should just break up! They said that Germany was so smart and strong and that he was wasting his time with a pasta-loving scrawny idiota like me! Germany broke up with me and then went for my brother and sometimes it to hurts to think about but I don't mind. My brother and Ludwig are happy and I have you! I'm afraid of losing you America! I don't want to lose you to someone else like I lost Ludwig to my brother. Back then I was careless because I was blinded by love but now I know what to do and I'm determined to be with you forever."

"Feliciano... I never knew that's why you and Ludwig broke up..." When they broke up, Alfred was the first to rush over to his side and provide him comfort. Alfred had tried to ask why but Feliciano didn't want to talk about it.

"It's alright. When we started dating I made a promise with myself not to let the one I love slip through my fingers but its happening now." Feliciano started to cry. The American gathered him in his arms and held him as he cried. The last time he'd seen his beloved Italian like this was when he and Ludwig broke things off.

"Feli... Shh..."

"I want to tell everyone as much as you do but its fear. Fear holds me back from doing something I want to do so bad... I want to tell as much as you do but the fear of losing you holds me back... I'm so sorry Alfie..." Feliciano cried.

"Baby, look at me. As long as I am your lover I will never abandon you when everyone says we won't work out like he did. That was his own choice to let go of you but I have no intention of ever letting you go. Both literally and figuratively." Feliciano kissed Alfred, some of his tears mixing into their locked lips. Alfred broke the kiss and carried Feliciano to the couch. Feliciano was on Alfred's lap and Alfred himself was sitting on the couch that was in front of the fireplace. They stayed like that for the rest of the day until the Italian fell asleep. Alfred let out a small smile and carried Feliciano to his room and laid him down on the bed.

Feliciano looked so cute when he was asleep and it made Alfred think back to the night they got together. It was New Years Eve 1951 and Feliciano came over to his house to spend the holiday with him. The countdown started and the ball was dropping and they looked at each other. When it reached zero, they kissed and that sparked something in them to start dating. After the kiss, the rest was history.

Alfred kissed his cheek and said,

"I'll never leave your side as long as I am still alive Italy." With that, America crawled in next to him and fell asleep holding him close.

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**Me: I hope you AmeIta shippers liked this and if you did then please favorite or review!**


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